It's Funny How Time Changes You...

I'm not working today, as there was no call for subs (I even called and asked - nothing). I secretly love these days off. I love being able to wake up and make my own schedule for the day, bake if I want to, clean the house a little bit more than normal, and run any errands that need to be done.





Even just a year or so ago I was considering teaching even when I had kids, or thinking about a variety of options so that I would be able to do it all - stay home a little with my kids, yet still be able to do my dream job (that was assuming I would get a high-school music position). But I can honestly say now that the desires of my heart have changed. A few years ago I would have bristled at the statement I'm going to make, but I can honestly say that all I want to do is stay home, take care of my house, and raise children (and eventually homeschool them, at least for a few years).

It was the quasi-feminist in me that felt the idea of staying home and only being a "homemaker" was so oppressive. I had talent! I was a good teacher! I wanted to be fulfilled by taking part in the career I thought would make me happy. Staying at home was so blah to me. All day? Every day? No thanks.

Maybe it is partially my husband's doing that my thoughts have changed about all of this. He would love to have me be able to stay home (part of the reason he is starting his online business). He is never negative about it when I don't get a subbing job - only genuinely happy that I got stay home and get things accomplished. I always thought this would make me feel second-class, but it really and truly doesn't. Making my home a comfortable and lovely place to be - whether that is via my attitude, the decor in my house, or the things I concoct in the kitchen - brings me such joy that I never thought would be possible before.

Do I miss teaching music a little bit sometimes? Of course. Do I wish that I was teaching high-school chorus right now? Absolutely. But given the option between the two? Well, I guess you could say that my heart is leading me home.

So for now, I'll continue to work. We still want to buy a house, and since I can earn money now, I will. But when the time comes for us to start our family, I'll be very much looking forward to it.

(Photos: "We're wild about music!"- one of my bulletin boards in my K-2 classroom last year -the stars on the left are for the bulletin board next to it; leading my 5th-grade Select Chorus in our Grease mini-musical for the Relay for Life cancer event; leading the entire 5th grade in their Grease program - singing "We Go Together"; and me with some of my awesome 5th grade kids. Check out my hair - that is post-program-sweaty-music-teacher frizz for you!)